They have their first date--he gazes into her eyes, and she desires to kiss him, of course--he resists, and their friendship grows into something beautiful.
AND it was not long until Christmas; therefore we did attend a Christmas concert together. And we did have much fun; and we did play agames together and enjoy each others' company.
2 And at the end of the night, we did drive home, and I did walk her to the door of the alobby of her dormitory.
3 And I did gaze into her eyes for the first time; and my heart did change, insomuch that I knew I would anever be the same.
4 And ashe did make her move, as if she would bkiss me. But behold, I being large in stature, and also righteous, therefore I knew that she was merely spellbound by the sheer magnitude of my studliness; therefore I did not kiss her.
5 Therefore our relationship began; and I did ponder often upon her, as I was home over Christmas break. And I did greatly desire to see her again, for she was truly a babe.
6 And in due time we did return to school, and I did continue in my aefforts to be with her, for she was truly a babe among all babes.
7 And it came to pass that I began to feel alove for her; and I knew not why, for I did not know her very well.
8 And as I got to know her, I did adiscover why I loved her; and if I were to write all the reasons, it supposeth me that all the volumes in the whole earth could not contain them. Amen.
Footnotes for Chapter 5
1a TG Ping-Pong
2a TG Lobby-loving; Freshmen; Dormitories; Wacky Practical Jokes
3a TG Love; Whooped, Starting to Get
4a There is some debate as to the historical accuracy of the events described in verse 4; however, there is no debate that the author must have been irresistible.
4b TG Smooch; Studs, Irresistible
6a TG Library, Stalking In; Study, Not Much Getting Done
7a TG Exciting and New
8a TG Studs, Sometimes Possessing Thick Skulls
* * * * * * * * * *
So there you have it, the historic first publication of The Book of Love. I hope you were enlightened as much by it as I was. Kind of makes me want to spend more time reading the Good Book, or maybe even writing some history of my own.
After all, as the Good Book says, "If you and your wife have really got it, why not flaunt it?" Or something like that.